- Accepting “No” Answers and Criticism — Bullies need to know about boundaries. They need to understand that they won’t always get their way, that they will sometimes be corrected, and that while it is OK to feel frustrated by this, it is not OK to take it out on others. Children who understand boundaries and the importance of keeping themselves in control are less likely to use manipulation and intimidation as a way of controlling others.
- Accepting Consequences — Understanding cause and effect is a vital self-government skill for bullies. Teachers and parents must have an effective system of positive and negative consequences for behaviors that are consistently used. They must regularly enforce that system, so children come to recognize which behaviors end up producing undesirable effects.
- Disagreeing Appropriately – This is the final and most useful skill to combat bullying. This skill illustrates to children and adults the process of communicating calmly to people when you disagree with them. People often bully because they have pent-up anger and frustration and don’t have the tools to communicate those feelings effectively with others. With this tool in their skill toolbox, people with bullying tendencies will have a better handle on finding an outlet for their frustrations instead of taking it out on others through bullying. If victims learn this skill, they can feel better prepared to dissolve high-stress bullying situations with calm, instead of escalating the situations by responding emotionally. When people respond calmly to emotionally-charged attacks, bullies often lose interest and will leave them alone.